Some Notes to Share

• Grandma hates Madeline's new haircut. It's hair, Mother, it will grow.
• I like being organized, I just don't like working to get there.
• I like being educated, I'm just too impatient to sit down and learn sometimes.
• Math class is much better than I anticipated. One answer. No elaborations. A welcomed break.
• Knowing what you're going to be for the rest of your life has to be way overrated. Adventure is good, Right?
• Apartment hunting with a roomie (and a daughter) means lots more confusion for everyone.
• A strong dislike of my being forgetful has developed, mostly by me.
• Great Expectations has hit below my expectations. I have pretty well forgone it for Riding in Cars with Boys. A great literary classic in the works, right? Hee hee.
• Boys, in general, are very strange. I have 2 brothers and a nephew and a weird dad, I can say that.

I think that's all I have for now. Have a terrific day, evening, night, whatever!

The Toddler Years...

Ok, so we still have a long way to go before we're out of the toddler years, but she's just so darn cute all the time... I can't help but brag...

Madeline's learning new things everyday. Right now we're working on speech and hopping. Yes, Hopping. We played on the trampoline last evening. She was having a blast. Then she started singing something and falling down. It took me a couple of times to catch it. It was, you guessed it, "Ashes! Ashes! DOOOWWWNN!" Too cute. I can't believe my little baby is learning songs already, wasn't she just 6 lbs. 5 oz, like 8 weeks ago? Really?

She's also being very good at mimicking me. She brushes her teeth and jabbers non-stop at home. We don't always know what she's saying, but it's cute. She doesn't seem to mind that we don't understand either. She understands us though she doesn't always listen. She's getting better at "No, no!" with the little finger shaking in my direction to. Maddie tries to put her shoes on unassisted and can go up and down the steps now. Wow.

Where has the time gone?

I do have a cute kid, Danielle, and I don't know how I got so blessed, but I am!

It's Friday for Certain

I'm ready to go... I'll leave the week with cute stories. Well, I think they're cute, but it's my daughter we're talking about here...

I have always known that kids learn to say "No" very quickly. Little did I know that it would come with a little finger being shaken in my direction with a firm "No, no." It was cute, I think you had to be there.

I recently purchased a fall peacoat for my little one. It's brown with pink ribbing ( I think I've spoke of it??). Well, she loves it and doesn't want to take it off INSIDE. Such as life.

Jabbering is a regular thing now. Last night my dad told Madeline, "You're silly, Madeline!" She hopped out of her pint sized lawn chair ran half-way to him and jabbered something that sounded like, "No, You're silly, Grandpa!" She turned around and ran back to her pint sized chair and climbed in and giggled. We all heard it and smiled.

Madeline's only shy when she can look cte being shy, convenient, huh?

I get read to on a regular basis now, not that I can understand what she's reading to me yet, but nonetheless, I get read to.

Have a great weekend everyone! HHS homecoming is tonight... anyone going besides me?

Things I Hate

I Hate...

• Cleaning. Any shape or form.
• being bored
• Laziness (thought I often am)
• busy signals
• turn signals on when they shouldn't be
• turn signals unused when they need to be
• being called an unintelligent donkey (there's more to that story)
• liking someone who doesn't have a clue that I like him
• not being sure how someone feels about me
• not being able to take care of myself
• fighting with my mother
• turning into my mother
• being wrong and not knowing it until it's too late
• being right, but the only one who knows that I'm right
• talking to angry customers when there's nothing I can do to make them happier
• being jealous
• being indecisive
• being overweight
• being left out because I can't get a babysitter
• being uninformed of the world, or my family
• being too busy for my friends
• going to weddings alone
• shopping without money to shop
• being hit on over the phone by a stranger
• having broken office equipment
• being on hold indefinately
• Not being able to get broken office equipment fixed
• being cold

I think that's all I can take for today... Sorry so glum.. Just lots going on. Have a great day.

Time to Take a Poll

What would you do??

So last night Madeline Grace and I were sitting around reading, playing playing peek-a-boo, normal toddler things, when my phone rings. Insert exhausted ::sigh:: here. I know who it is, but do I really want to talk to him? No, I really don't, but I answer despite.

Madeline's Father (though I'm using that term loosely), Chris: "Hey, Babe"

Rachel's thoughts: What am I am a pig?

Rachel's words: "Hey"

Chris: "Can you call me on my mom's phone?"

Rachel's thoughts: Can't we ever have a normal conversation? I know it's long distance, but does it always have to be MY nickel? seriously?

Rachel's words: "What's the number?"

Rachel's thoughts: Why am I so nice?

I call the number, he answers: "Hey, sweetie."

Rachel's thougts: Would it be rude to gag myself right now?

Rachel's words: "What's going on, Chris?"

Chris: "I just had a bad day, Girl. I'm tired of all this bull sh** up here. I just want to be a dad, and be ther for my little girl. You know I want to be there, Girl. You know I do."

Rachel's Thoughts: THEN FREAKING STEP IT UP!!!

Rachel's words: "You already know what you need to do Chris. Just be here for her once. That'd be great..."

Chris: "I want to take her Trick or Treating; I think I should do that as her dad and all. You know. I want to be there I really do."

Rachel's thoughts: You're not taking my little girl anywhere near any of your Halloween goons, sorry.

Rachel's words: "Don't you think that you should meet Madeline before you see her in costume, Chris?"

Chris: "Girl, I want to be there, I do, I just had a really bad day. I got arrested this week."

Rachel's thoughts: Holy cow. Do I even want to know?

Chris: "Here me out, Girl. this is what happen. I get a call at work, right? This guy went to my brother's school and tried to run over my cousin and my brother. I left work, and went to find the guy. I found him. I got in hie face about it. We started yelling. He pulled out a machetti, you know, a big knife, so I hit him."

Rachel's thoughts: I was right, I didn't want to know.

Chris continues: "Then he all calls the cops on me. I got arrested and sent to JAIL, Rache. My mom had to post $1000 to get me out of there."

Rachel's thoughts: Yep. Shouldn't have answered the phone.

Rachel's words: "I don't even know what to say, Chris. What were you thinking?

Chris: "You'd do the same thing, Girl, don't deny."

Rachel's thought: Pretty sure I wouldn't walk up to a violent person who tried to run my family over. Definately not someone with a knife either.

Rachel's words: "No, I don't think I would."

Chris: "The p-I mean- Cop that arrested my a$$ said my lisence was suspended. I didn't know, Rachel. I swear I didn't know. Now I can't even drive to see my baby."

Rachel's thoughts: Ahh, that's to bad.

Rachel's words: "I'm sorry?"

Chris: "No really, Girl. You know I want to be a dad. For Real. I don't want her thinking I'm some scum of the earth white trash."

Rachel's thoughts: Well...

Rachel's words: " I don't know what to tell you. I don't know what you were thinking. You have to think about Madeline first if you want to be a dad. Not how tough you look trying to beat up some mug off the street, Chris. And you can't have this attitude when you show up in court, you know. They'll get you."

Chris: "I know."

Rachel's thoughts: You're not a smart person. I don't think that I really want Maddie around you at all. Pretty sure I don't.

Rachel's words: "What re you going to do now, Chris?"

Chris: "Can you come see me this weekend."

Rachel's thought: Hell no. I'm not wasting my gas on your sorry ass.

Rachel's words: "I don't think that's a great idea Chris. I told you that you have to come here. You're the one that's never seen her."

---This leads to the blame game.---

The convo is ended be:

Chris: "Will you call me to see if I'm out of Jail or not?"

Rachel's thoughts: Do I have to?

Rachel's words: "Do I have to? I mean, How am I going to know if you are or if you're just not answering?"

Chris: "Thanks, call my mom's number she'll know, and I might be here anyway."

Rachel's thoughts: Great... just what I want, another grandma to make me feel guilty.

Rachel's words: "OK"

Chris: "Will you please come here this weekend? Please? I need to see my baby girl."

Rachel's thougts: I think not

Rachel's words: "We'll see, but not if you're in Jail. I will NOT take Maddie there"

Chris: "I know. I wouldn't want you to either. But will you drive here if I'm not."

Rachel's words: "I'll Call you tomorrw."

What would you do? Would you go there? I really don't want to, but I almost feel bad. Almost. But I don't know if I'm just being stubborn or if it's really the right decision. What would you do?

I've Been Tagged!

I was Tagged by Danielle W. Here goes nothing:


10 years ago... wow. I was freshly twelve and entering 6th grade with Mrs. Driskill. Awkward year of remaking friends that I'd had for 6 or 8 years. This was the year I missed 2 weeks of school due to Bronchial pneumonia and 4 weeks of beloved dance class and dreaded gym. Also when the boys and girls were divided for gym so had study hall with the boys while the girls we at gym (did that make sense?)... and when I stuck my tongue out at Ryan P. who told me, and I quote, "You can't French kiss long distance!" I was horrified.

5 years ago... I was 17. I was invincible and boy crazy, but it was the "end of getting burned by boys." I was going through a "non-dating" time (now I should be so lucky to chose this). By this time 5 years ago, I had been stood up twice and been broken up with in public. But I had close friends and wild weekends. I think this is when I started experimenting more with different colors of red hair. I think I had 6 or 8 shades of red throughout high school and college. What else would a 17 year old need?

1 year ago... I had just turned 21, not that it really mattered anymore. I had a precious 4 1/2 month old baby girl. It took mere seconds for her to steal my heart, and a year ago was BEFORE all the toddler fits we have now... LOL. I wasn't taking classes then. I had started at my parents' company in July after she was born.

Yesterday/today

Work, work, work. And Madeline. That's all I make time for most of the time now. Yesterday, she got up at 5:30 am. About an hour before she usually even rolls over. Yeah, I was early to work even after I made breakfast.

This morning my new adventure was cleaning up after she dumped everything out of my wallet. Credit cards, debit cards, gift cards. All of it. That was exciting.

Now, I tag... Chelsea and Darcie and Andrea. Have fun!!!!!!!!!! ;) Let me know when you've played!

I know, the suspense is killing you so...

Last week was a crazy one at the office. I was really ready to relax this weekend, but was too tense. Friday night Madeline, Krystle and I went shopping in LS. That was fun. I bought Miss Maddie a new jacket. It's super cute. It's a Peacoat, brown with pink trim. From OldNavy. I looked for it on their website to show you, but I couldn't find it. Too bad too. It's realllllly cute. I finished up the evening playing pool. I decided to stop when I lost to myself. Sad. Very Sad.

Saturday Madeline was up at 6:30 am and rearing to go. We stumbled through breakfast and got ready. We made it to the Cass County Living History Festival around 9:30 in time for the first parade of old cars and marching bands. Ate too much and went to Wal-Mart. (are you making note of what you're missing?)

Yeah... Maddie's father was a no-show. I called him on Friday night. He was "sick" and couldn't come down this weekend. So mad at him. So mad. But, what can 'ya do?

That was yet another exciting weekend at the our house. How was your weekend?

More Notes to Share

• I'm no good with anxiety.
• I detest waiting for people to call me back.
• My bedtime is at 9:30. If I stay up later than that, I am crabby. Today, I'm crabby.
• I don't always follow directions, but it really irks me when other people don't follow my directions. Grr.
• When it rains, it pours. And usually hails.
• I don't like it when guys (that I've never met) hit on me over the phone. It weirds me out.
• I'm a procrastinator. If anyone needs tips, let me know later.
• I don't believe that my brother and I would get along well enough to be roomies.
• I'm poor.
• I don't spend mullah like I'm poor sometimes.
• I hate cleaning.
• I love Fridays.
• I have a three day weekend coming soon. Halleluah!
• My older brother can tell incredibly funny stories at 11pm on a weeknight when I'm tired and slap-happy.
• I'm blunt and quiet. I think people think I'm rude.

I think that's all for now. I think it's a little bit of a downer, but I'm not very perky today. I'll be better next time. I promise. Have a nice day.

Tractors, Tractors Everywhere.

So I get home last night with a nearly grumpy 1 year old. She always wants to stay outside and play as soon as we get home. Lately, I have had to help with dinner more, and I like to get out of my nice work clothes before we run amok outside. But last night, I was out of fight and Grandpa was in his shop attempting to change a belt on his lawn tractor, so we ventured that way for a visit.

A frustrated grandfather greeted us. He had been working to change the belt for a total of over two hours. He decided to take a break and visit and give Maddie a tractor ride on the bigger Ford tractor. He started it and the sound spooked her a little with the echo inside the shed, so I held her until Grandpa got situated.

He hopped on the tractor, put it in gear and started to back up. And kept backing up. And kept backing up. Into his year old John Deere Lawn mower. It slides off the ramps and skids through the gravel to a sideways position where my dad has to finally cut the engine to get the tractor to stop. Hmm. That's not good. I am far away from the tractor and this point clenching my daughter with my hand over my mouth. When he cut the engine, she pulls my hand down like, "Don't do that, Mommy."

He starts the tractor again. Still in reverse the clutch won't engage. This time, the tractor's headed up the side of the lawn tractor. The Huge back wheel of the tractor is 2 feet off the ground and rising. I yell,

"Stop, Dad!" Really beginning to worry.

"I Can't!" is his reply. I was seeing visions of upsidedown tractors flashing in my head. Once again, he cuts the engine. My heart slows down to normal.

One more time he persists, and the tractor (clutch and all) are doing fine. He went forward and backwards two or three times. No major damage to the John Deere (surprisingly enough), and no tractor rides for my daughter for awhile. That was scary. And if Madeline had been on board, it could have been worse. But all is well now. Nothing is parked behind the Ford tractor though.

Loony bin, here I come...

First of all, I'd like to say... My daughter is OFFICIALLY a toddler and my parents are officially laughing at what I will go through with her in the time near. The latest: my darling 16 month old threw an animal cracker on the floor last night. Playfully, I asked her to retrieve it and "hand it to mommy." She shook her head no. Ok, breathe, Rachel. "Madeline, pick up the cookie." Here begins the first sign of a screaming, raging fit that I have only seen once or twice when she wants me to pick her up and I cannot for one reason or another. I grabbed her arm so she wouldn't bang her head on our hardwood kitchen floor. I sat her up and told her again, "Madeline, pick up that cookie, now." Same kind of response. Then I swipe her precious "binky" and tell her to pick up the cookie and she'll get it back. Yeah... That made her really mad. She laid down, face down, on the floor and cried. I stood up and did dishes and continued with dinner. She got up and walked around the island looking for someone to save her (i/e a grandparent). No one else was near. She sat down, laid down and started over. I asked her to come back to the cookie. I got a verbal, "NO" that time. So I walked over to her, stood her up, and made her walk to the cookie, lean over and pick it up. Now, if that didn't take enough work... She picked up the cookie, and THREW IT AGAIN. Breathe, Rachel, Breathe. I hold her hand, pick up the cookie, and hand it to myself in the other hand. I told her thank you, handed her the stupid binky and continued with dinner. A few minutes later, my dad comes wandering in the room, Maddie runs to him, he scoops her up, she starts jabbering and pointing at me. She goes on for a good minute. The only word either of us caught from the jabbering was, "Cookie."

Point to ponder: Who's more stubborn? Madeline or her mom?

Labor Day Weekend

So I planned sooooo much for this last weekend, and I got my laundry done. That was it. Nice, huh? Oh well. Such as Life. I got to hang out with my daughter more than usual which is wonderful. I hate that her daycare provider gets to spend more wakeful hours during a work week than I do. Wow. Never thought I'd hear myself say that. Or see it in writing. Whichever. However, at this particular moment in time, she is NOT making it easy for me to type. She's pulling at my shirt sleeve, and I know that she just wants to type on the keyboard she doesn't really want me. So I'm reduced to peek-a-boo and typing at the same time, and it's difficult to not type what I am saying. So if you get a "where's Madeline?" or part of that randomly, I'm sorry.

I had a full day of training today in the CLT Harrisonville office. It was great. I really feel like I learned more. There are still things that I am going to be uncomfortable with for awhile, but I know that some of it will come with time. The rest I will just have to ask about.

Check out the new CLT website. See if you can find where they are advertising my blog. Fun, huh?

It's almost someone's bedtime. And I think Maddie's getting sleepy too. HaHaHa. No, really, she hasn't slept all night in about a week. A new aversion which I refuse to get used to. I am thinking it's the crib, and she's wanting a "big girl bed" (a toddler bed). Or simply something that she won't bump her head on as she does her spherical rolling at the wee hours.

I GOT IT

Had to take a second to revise my information from the last post. Not only did I fill in in Pleasant Hill last week, but I just got the call that I am going to be the PROCESSOR in P Hill from now on! Who's Excited? ME! ME! ME!!! It's closer to home by a little, and more responsibility. YEA!!!

Can you do it? Yes! I can.

So when the regular hustle and bustle starts to get to you, something new and different is always thrown your way. Okay, maybe not yours, but definitely mine. Just when I think it's all under control and I'm starting to get comfortable someone has to do something to change all my thoughts on life. I will not go into great details. Sparing you is best. But everything is changing once again. And I'm not sure it's all for the better. There are some good changes:

On Tuesday evening, my manager Brenda called me at 7 pm, "Rachel, I forgot to ask you, can you work in Pleasant Hill tomorrow? They really need another set of hands." I'm thinking, I have to go, I can't say no. But I'm so nervous. She continues: "Just be there to be the closer's assistant. Do anything she wants." That sounds like words of doom right? No, not really. I learned so much this week. How to put things together so that they really make sense to me and to everyone else in the office. I know that I probably made an error or two, but that's where the learning begins. I made sure the closer looked over all my stuff. I feel really great about getting stuff done this week at work. Though I was told that I was missed in Raymore too.

Yesterday, I went to Y'allapolooza. I took pictures. I still have to get them developed, but I will have to scan them into the computer and make all the commentary I have planned for them. That will be interesting I promise. [insert mischievous laughter here]

Madeline is growing and learning more words everyday. She has almost mastered "popcorn" now. That's probably close to her favorite food. No worries, us adults have to eat all the halls for her while she gets the rest. It's a Sunday night thing. Let's see: momma, grandpa, grandma, kitty, puppy, all done, popcorn, no, yeah, hi, bye-bye, no-no-no, and various grunts that a mom understands after a while. We're working on "drink" and "bink" which sound lots alike, but she knows them apart when I say them; I just have to get her to say them. Did I mention she can say "no"? Yeah, she's good at testing that one too. Especially when she wants to climb the steps in our living room. I say, "No, Maddie," with as much force as possible without yelling, then, "NO Madeline," raising my voice just a tad. Then comes, "Madeline Grace! Get down!" And she giggles as I scoop her up before she ends up on her head. Oh! The joys of toddlerhood are just beginning, I know. But I'm really wishing for a ranch style home right about now. Maybe soon... But if it's not the steps it's something else. Did I tell you what my precious nephew and niece did awhile back?

They are 3 and almost 2. Twenty months apart. Cute kids. Here goes: my brother and sister in law were in the living room catching a sit down moment while the youngsters were in my nephew's toy, er, I mean bed room. Rather suddenly, CRASH! The sounds of glass shatters through the house. I imagine my sister in law gasping and nearly screaming at the same time then running to the room, no telling what flashed in their heads. When they made the fifteen foot journey in three steps (as they are each six foot in height, jealous, me?), they arrive to find their children laughing. The cause? A book thrown into the light fixture on the ceiling fan. Result? Relief that no one was hurt. Time out. And lots of vacuuming for my brother. Yes, I know that the journey has only begun.

Rachel's New Favorite Quote:

I always wanted to be somebody, but now
I realize I should have been more specific.

Lily Tomlin

Raise your hand....

Most of my readers are my age, I think. That's all I ever hear from anyway, so for those of you my age... are you tired of "growing up"? Well, I'm not tired of it. I'm just tired of being left in the dust. I have to be more mature, and that's great. BUT, when I have people that I consider less mature than I am, less prepared to see the real world raise it's ugly head getting into home buying, I get extremely jealous. I, being the the real estate industry, consider myself somewhat knowledgable on the subject. Somewhat. So some of these people come to me to show me their homes and ask advice, and I want to scream, "Well, WHAT ABOUT US? When is it our turn to move out?" Can't I even afford a "manufactured home" or rent alone. And I crunch the numbers and stretch the pennies and realize it's going to be a long while. And I sink back into my advice- giving, sulking, still-living-at-home shell and still wonder when our time will be.

*("our" refering to Maddie and me)*

It's Friday

Does anyone else still celebrate TGIF? I look forward to it every week. Not that I necessarily hate my job, but I'm just so worn out all the time and sleeping in a half and hour and the possibility of catching a nap perks me up on Fridays thinking of the weekend. This weekend we have my mom's side family reunion. So excited. Really. I don't like to drive all weekend, but I know that it will be fun, once we get there. I'd rather be home working on school stuff honestly. One of my first assignments is to watch three hours of criminal justice TV and do a report. 3 hours of CSI, Law & Order, Cops or NCIS? I can handle it. It's rather a sociology assignment as we have to record the race and age of suspects and victims and what products are being advertised during the show to see who they're trying to reach. I'm excited.

Words of Wisdom from someone who's been there:

(see what my week's been like)

Don't let your child run around without clothes or diapers while trying to potty train her. Just don't do it.

Do let Grandma pick up the "cutest baby" pictures from the studio. She will buy the extras. Hee Hee!

Don't ever head to bed with a half awake little one and expect her to go right to sleep. Ever.

Do have lunch with an "old" friend. Those are the best lunches (and the longest! Oops!)

Don't hit the snooze button 4 times and expect to take a ten minute shower and be on time for work.

Do play peek-a-boo once a day. Or some other version if you only have a cat.

Don't bit off more than you can chew. Literally or figuratively.

Do call (or email or comment to) your friends and let them know what they mean to you.

Do NOT call him. You know-- HIM. (see previous post for more details)

Do keep your options open.

Don't give up.

Do strive to be happy and get what you want. While still keeping all this in mind.

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

I know I just wrote about "Rainbow Resort" being sort of an under the rainbow theme, but today, I am wishing to be Dorothy on my way to OZ, while walking through a truly mystic place confronting the unknown, away with the dull black and white, and hit me with the new and bold. Give me some color and change. I want out of the old dreads and ruts. And I'm not talking about being a mom, that's never boring. Or really work. We started a new computer system today, and I am thoroughly enjoying being caught up to the 21st century here, finally. Really, it's where "love" or the lack there of is concerned (see also http://6yearmed.blogspot.com for more people who are in this same kind of rut).

I haven't really dated anyone since, well, since August of 2003. That's really a long time for me. I have been "casually dating" or "talking" or "hanging out with" a guy that I have known since high school. In fact, we were very serious in HS, and voted "Most Likely to Be A Couple in Ten Years" our senior year. Very ironically, or realistically (whichever way you prefer to phrase it), we broke up about 7 months later and hadn't talked for two years. (That's a long time, folks) We started "talking" again last November, and we still get together for a game of pool now and again. That's it though. It's really just pool. And I think that somewhere in my want-to-be romantic train of thought, I am thinking it would be cute if we were back together, but on this dreary Monday, all I want to do is detest the boy for being himself, and loathe myself for not moving on every time I get the chance. But the problem remains, that I don't really ever get the chance. He's here and now, and I don't want to work and put myself out there for someone new, not that I ever really meet new people at all. I have all my routines to a 'T', and I thought school would open up doors--there are 2 males in my class. Yeah, 2 out of about 22. Neither for me.

See also the link to my poems for more thoughts here... Have a nice day... don't let this bring you down... think happier thoughts...

Worn to the core

"Intro to Criminal Justice" ends tonight, and Criminology begins in a week. I am very excited about that class. I think that it will be the deal breaker on whether or not I stick with the program. It's supposed to be the "why" in crime.

I got to work in our Harrisonville location today to fill in for the processor. It was a great learning experience to try to learn what goes on in the company. I really liked it.

That's it for now, I'm a little tired. See y'all, ok, YOU ALL later!! ;)

Rainbow Resort

On Saturday, my cousin Tori wanted me to take her to the "Aquatic Center." I didn't want to go, in the least little bit. I was tired and annoyed and hot, and there was no way I was going to a pool in my home town while being expected to wear a swimsuit during prime hours. Huh-uh, not a chance. So, we decided to get out the little inflatable pool stored in our garage for Maddie. Little did I know, it was too little for the 9 year old Tori; that didn't go over well. But it was perfect size for my little one. It's inflatable all the way around and has an inflatable rainbow over one side to provide shade. So cute, and so perfect for a hot afternoon. Needless to say, of course, she didn't play it very long, the water was cold and the toys old. But I thinking while she was playing, I wish I had a "rainbow resort," as I'd named the pool in my mind. A little shade, a little sun, cool water, entertainment, and someone to look out for me and catch me when I slip up. Do you have a Rainbow Resort?

So the way things go

My posting is dwendeling a little, I know, I know, but I never know if anyone besides DW is reading them anyway, she's the only comment I ever get (Hint, hint, DS and Keri!). I've been really busy at work and school and with Miss Maddie lately. Crazy days at the end of a busy month. I was at work until after 5:30 last night, and still had to take the mail and recordings to our Harrisonville office. I didn't get home until after 6:15 last night. It was craziness, really. I am entering week 4 of 5 for my class... I'm doing better and have a much better learning team this time around, but it's going soooo quickly, I'm not sure that I can really, truly keep up. I have a big paper due next Tues or Wed that I haven't really started. I have half of an outline, that's it. My 9 year old cousin Tori is staying with us this week for VBS... I think I'm going nuts with her there. She's sweet, but she wants to mother my daughter and tell me what to do and I don't like it, but she's leaving Sunday. Sunday. Sunday. I'm taking Maddie and her to the pool tonight, any voluteers to go with?

I am embarking on new adventures everyday, and considering my options. I think my mother thinks I'm crazy, but we will see what happens. I applied to NWMSU with intentions to attend this coming Spring trimester. It will take probably two full years from that time, but I plan to go to school all year round. I am really starting to think that this is the best option for Maddie and for me. I can get into the career I want. I know that I can borrow $$ and work part time to afford rent, food, etc. I have an offer from a friend there to stay with her until I have a place for us, and I have a job at Sonic, if I want it. I have to get accepted again to NW and all that, but it's a thought. It's been pulling at me for awhile that I may want to do this so we'll see what happens.