Why TV is important

I had no idea there was anything of note going on the world until I got to Government at 12:30 today. Really. You people with TV should be ashamed of yourselves for not writing about it. Afterall, I want to know about these things. Sort of.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14717778/

PS-- I have a TV, just no way to get reception without cable or "rabbit ears."

On Getting Older...

This morning "The Princess" and I slept in. It was nice, but I like to have her to "school" before 9, as her "class" starts around 9am. We awoke at 8am. I decided to get her ready and forego my normal pick out clothes, etc. for myself (don't worry, I did brush and wash before we left). I grabbed a clean long sleeved Tee from the drawer. As I was putting it on, I realized that this particuliar shirt was nearly five years old. Besides that, there were OLDER Tees lying next to it. Tees from 1999. Seriously. I put on the long sleeved "Thespian" shirt and went on my way.

On campus today, I joked in my head (I do that instead of talking out loud to myself), that some other girl had "my" back pack, and that I should bet her that mine was older. Then I realized how old mine was and wanted to cry. I realized that my ex bought this back pack for my for my nineteenth birthday. I'm 23.

(British) Literature, Literature (for Adolescence), (American) Literature

My one o'clock class was cancelled. The 2nd of the 2 of the classes that I really enjoy on Monday and Wednesdays. Literature for Adolescence. I climbed three flights of stairs only to see the posting. I had been two doors down for my eleven o'clock class and did not see this sign. But I have to climb those same three flights to pludge to my two o'clock. Skipping sounds very appealing at the moment. Two o'clock is early American Lit with is really, really reminding me of Mrs. Cockill's class, for the reasons I didn't want to remember about that class. This professor, it seems, likes to hear her own voice and be right. All the time. All. The. Time. It drives me batty. I know that this is the stuff that we HAVE to read for early American Literature, but it's so dull. But it's all that's there. I'm determined as a teacher to teach what I can stand of this, and let the history books do the rest. That's all the literature is from that era is recorded history. Dry. Dull. I'll take Beowulf any day!

Speaking of, that's what my first paper is on coming up for my British Lit class. We have one translations of Beowulf in our books, but we have to find another one and compare the two. Fully opinion (which is my kind of paper!), and I can get one paper out of the way early. This is the third time I've studied Beowulf, so if I don't have it now, I never will! (Once in HS, once in Intro to Lit @ NW, and now!)

For art, I'm needing to find a current event to do a presentation on. But we can't repeat someone else's presentation. I don't present until October 26... I think that I'll have to wait until like the 20th to even pick a topic and hope that no one takes it between then and the 26th.

Jessica-- You may think I was a little harsh on the iPod peeps... but I have yet to get one iPod-listening-messenger-bag-toting-soul to make eye contact. No, not one. No, not one. You, my dear friend, seem to be an exceptional person, but then, you knew that.

Danielle-- Yes, yes, I'm getting old. The big 2-3. That's way old. But then it's not the number. It's the mentality, I think. I again heard a drunken weekend story that I believe would have abhorred my conscience being 3-4 years ago. A story of strippers in one hotel room and "girls gone wild" in the other. Chills down my spine. Great nipple story to you though.

I'm wearing my "Mom" bracelet today. It makes me smile just to see it. I got "the lip" when I dropped Miss Mad off at "school" this morning. As my late grandpa would have said "a bird could have perched..." well, I'm not going to say what he always did. She didn't cry; she just pouted. It still made me a little sad, but I know once she started in on the cinimon roll, she was going to be fine. The director was right there to help her into breakfast and get her to class too.

I think we're all settled into our place. Officially. I threw away boxes and more boxes in Tuesday's trash collection. It took three trips to get them all to the road. I hung up pictures like crazy on Monday; the only one's I have left at the Wizard of Oz ones. That's b/c I have 2 of those. I don't like groups of two on the wall. I think I'll have to deal, but I may ask for another pic from the parental units for Christmas.

Monday, Monday

I've been to college before. I really have. I just now have an insanely conservative outlook on life in general now. Well, maybe not "insane," but close. My wild weekend included popcorn and kisses from my daughter. I heard some guy ask another if anyone got arrested at his party on Saturday night. I think I shot them an accidental look of surprise. I shouldn't have. They are acting like college boys do, but it's just so different for me. Really. Maybe I'm just turning into my mother earlier than I thought I would be.

Another thing-- besides the drunken behavior talk-- no one talks to each other here. They're all too busy talking on their phones, texting, or listening to their dang iPods. Now, I'm all for technology, but I came to school so that I would have to be constantly answering phones all day. Really.

Too Darn Hot

The boys? No, they could never be.... It's too hot to be walking all over the free world looking for my classes. Seriously. Okay, maybe it's not that bad. Perhaps, if I shed a few pounds it would be a little easier.

I'm in the "Computer Commons" area right now... there's a baby a few rows back that the mother is "Sushing." It's cracking me up. I don't know why, but it is... I guess, just b/c it's not me!

I should be doing some homework now, but, oh, wait, what's that? I'm DONE. I did it last night and don't have a class until noon. I'm not used to working ahead. I realize that this is just the first week and I will have plenty to do in the coming weeks, but I am welcoming the break for now!

Okay, enough. Back to wandering aimlessly around campus.

Moving, Being Moved, and the Black Hole (aka, My New Laundry Room)

I realize it's been awhile, but I don't have internet at my new place and haven't trecked it to the library until today. My classes start in less than an hour and my stomach is going CRAZY with butterflies. It was three years ago this semester that I was pregnant... wow.

We're still settling into our new place. I still have a box here and there to unpack, but we're there for the most part. Madeline is still getting used to the idea of her own bedroom. And bed for that matter so it's going to be a little bit of a battle I think. But she has really cute bed stuff!!

I'm really excited about Mad's new daycare. It seems great... but she was not very excited about it this morning. She cried more than I ever want to see her cry when I leave her anywhere. I know she'll be fine, but I have to admit I cried too. No matter how much I think I'm doing the right thing here, I still have doubts.

I'm very excited that my new place has a dishwasher and washer and dryer. I cannot tell you how excited I am without you actually witnessing this goofy grin I have on my face right now. However, our laundry room is in the basement. I have to walk outside and down a hill to get there. And it's REALLY a basement. An unfinished on at that. It will be a little scary, and I have a felling that I'll lose some great clothes to the dryer. (Violen here please)

One thing that I will get used to is looking at college boys again. As long as they don't speak, they're perfect. Just kiddding. Sort of. Off to class. I hope you enjoyed the update. Have a great day.

Growl

Having a bad day at work... Only 4 days left. If you hear me whispering this, it's because it's my mantra (sp?). "Only 4 days..."

[note: I'm not as bi-polar as I may seem on here... I can have a bad day right after a great day and not be bi-polar, right?]

Happy Day

Thanks for your birthday wishes, Danielle and Jessica!

I had a happy day. Really. Madeline and I spent the night before at my parents so that we could wake up to a nice cool house for once... Before we were totally awake yesterday, she started singing, "Happy birthday to you..." Now, I don't know if that was random or what, but it was very cute and made my day! Madeline was soon at daycare, and I headed to "The Burg" (as I'll call it here) to cover some school/daycare/misc. Business. I got my $45 parking pass (ouch!), my info on health insurance, my promisary note signed, application for child care "help" filled out, and toured a GREAT daycare facility there. I'm enrolling my monster, I mean, daughter as soon as possible. It's a very structured daycare, that I didn't think I would ever want, but there is so much room for these kids to play and learn. They have a preschool in the morning with reading and music and art and science from 9 to 11 every day (and recess). I'm very excited about this place. Very. I'm mailing the enrollment form today. Yes, I'm that excited.

Went to LATE lunch with Danielle S. (who clearly sympathizes with me one being old, unlike DW... j/k). That was fun... it's always great to catch up.

I was going to go home and take a little cat nap before dinner, but I decided to pick up my daughter early from daycare and go to the park. Yes, it was hot, but she had fun for the whole 20-30 minutes I let her play. I didn't have a hat for her with me, and she was saying that her hair was hot (we did have sunscreen for the rest of her though, no worries). We caught up with "Granny and Pa Pa" at "Pa Pa's office" and headed to Longhorn for dinner. I only chose that place for the Chocolate Stampede. Yes, it was great! (And, bonus, we got it for free b/c I told the server I wanted that instead of the normal one!)

It really was a great day... I'm excited about getting totally moved and getting started with school. I'm ready. Thanks again for the birthday wishes, you gals are the best.

PS-- found my phone! (Note for posterity: always check your pockets)

So that's what happens...

If you haven't heard from Danielle or Jessica... I went out with them and a few others on Friday night. I was a little nervous leaving Madeline with a new sitter (not that it was the sitter that made me nervous, just the fact the Maddie's two and can act very, very two... that made me nervous). We had a blast. Danielle and Jessica called it a night (like normal people would) around 11:30 or so, I think. The others and this mom? Well, I didn't get home until after 2am. The last time that I stayed up that late... was... well... maybe sometime that Madeline couldn't sleep... or was sick... it's been years otherwise. Our friend Danielle S turned 23 on the 27th and we were celebrating.

But I lost my cell phone. Not at the restaurant. Not at the bowling alley (which was very, cool). Nope, not at the bar (where there seemed to be an abundance of men! Yea!). Not even at the babysitter's house where I picked up Madeline. I had it right after that. I checked the time. No, sometime in my 2am daze, half-asleep state, I lost my cell phone. It will turn up. I know it will. The battery's dead so I can't call it and find it either. So, don't call or text me. Well, you can call, just leave a voicemail, with your name and number (b/c Lawd knows, those are all in my cell phone), and I'll check the messages and call you back when I can. E-mail works too.

But it was worth it. Even if I never find that dang phone, it was worth it. Thanks for a great night out.

Positive Thinking

*My mother's leg will heal. She will be less stir crazy... eventually.
*My daughter will not be two forever.
*We are moving to "The 'Burg" (I signed the lease and everything!)
*My parents will have to call and make plans to come over.
*Two bedrooms will be much better than one.
*One dishwasher will be much better than none.
*My own washer and dryer will be Magnificent. Even if they break.
*Having a little deck and yard (maintenance free, mind you) will be peaceful.
*My landlord NOT living downstairs is a definate plus.

All for now.... sorry so cryptic.... Out of time AND energy... never a great combo.

*I'm annoyed that everyone else in the county needs to go to Wal*Mart at the same time as I do.
*I'm annoyed that there are only 2 Wal*Marts in my county.
*I'm annoyed...gas prices.
*I'm annoyed that my 10 year old cousin is staying at my parents and requires as much attention as my two year old.
*I'm annoyed that I decided to take them both to Wal*Mart.
*Annoyed that school hasn't started yet.
*I'm annoyed that I'll be 23 in less than a month.
*I'm annoyed that I'm so annoyed.
*I'm annoyed that this all is not as humorous as it was last night in my head.

10 unspoken thoughts

I stole this from Missing JT Snow who stole it from Kami. Try it yourself - List ten things you want to say to people you know but you never will, for whatever reason. Don't say who they are. Use each person only once:

1. I want to laugh at you everytime I think about you. I avoid your family, friends and former friends like the plague just because I 'm afraid I'll say something I'll regret, like, "You got what you deserved." And I hope by now, you can keep it in your pants.

2. I have to admit that I wasn't sure about your relationship at first, but I am truly happy for you now.

3. You've been there for me since kindergarten, and I've always felt like we had something in common with the "country bumkin" in us compared to everyone else. I'm sorry that I didn't call on your birthday. I'm a selfish friend. Hope it was happy.

4. We've never been that close, but weirdly I know more about you in the last couple of years than I ever did growing up. Thanks for starting a blog.

5. Get over yourself already. The whole world is NOT against you. You are against change in the world. Grow up and face it like a WOman.

6. Listen to me you immature little prick, I don't care what you are doing now. I don't care that I am not getting money from you anymore, but I do care that what you think doesn't matter DOES. And that you think you can walk back anytime you want, you can't.

7. I wish I had the power to tell you, "No." I have the power in my head, but then you call and it's gone. Like magic. Like the magic we used to have. I would do (almost) anything for you. And almost anything to have you back.

8. I love you with all my heart. You are my favorite person on the whole planet. I never knew that one person could change my life so much, so quickly, so completely.

9. No matter what, I'm always here for you. I hope that you can talk to me about stuff. I know that I'm way into "mom" world, and I'm starting to sound like my mom... but I hope that you can always ask my advice or for an ear to listen, even if you never plan on heeding my advice or talking very loud.

10. You're so thoughtful. whenever I'm having a bad week. I know that you'll send something that will cheer me up. Whether it's a little letter in the mail, pictures or an email or a comment. Whatever it is, you make me smile. Thanks for being so great. You have no idea what it means. I'm sorry that I'm not so hot at returning the favor.

Memorable

Friday night was my dad's side of the family Independence Day celebration. We always try to move it around to accomidate as many as possible. This year we wanted to make sure my "little" brother was going to be there (he works Sat., Sun., and Mon. nights). We were having a great time. One of Grandma's cousins was there which Dad hadn't seen in over 30 years. Dad went over board on fireworks even more than usual this year. Probably to celebrate his indepence from children as this is his first in 33 years that he hasn't had at least one child living at home. On the finale round of fireworks, all the "boys" got in close to light the massive round of boxes that held the fireworks. They'd all read the directions, including my brother. When Matthew (that's my "little" brother) leaned into light his "box," the aerial shell blasted out of the box, and into his forehead and one skimmed the side of his face and his right ear. He was thrown to the ground. I was standing on the deck; then I was running. He got up holding his head and the side of his face. When he got into the light, we all could see that he had black powder all over his face and the hugest goose egg anyone had ever seen in the middle of his forehead. Hugest. He was bleeding just a little on the side of his face. That was pretty much the end of my good mood for the evening.

Madeline and I went home late. Got to sleep late. Woke up late. I awoke at about 9:30 to my phone ringing. It was my older brother. "Sorry to wake you." That's not a good thing to hear first thing in the morning. "Mom tried to out-do Matthew this morning."

"What?!"

"Well, I guess Mom was walking down the stairs into the kitchen this morning, she fell and broke her left leg. Pretty bad. Mom and Dad are at the hospital right now."

I was still thinking that this was a dream, in my non-wakeful state.

But it's all true. Cross my heart. Mom had surgery on Saturday afternoon. 6 screws and one plate in her leg right about her ankle. She's on crutches and moving a little slow, but okay.

Both of these happenings could have been worse. We're counting our blessings.

Friday, June 30, 2006

This morning I woke up. I went to work. Now I'm at the library. Later I have a family thing. Next week Madeline's daycare is closed (lucky me). I have to go to the Post Office before I get back to work. Oh, the exciting days of our lives...

Welcome to "Our World"

Jessica-- so glad you got a blog... I know that I have your phone number, and I know that you have email, and I know that you have text messages, and I know that we have been friends since we were four, but this somehow seems so much easier... Welcome.

Visit Jessica at the Psych Ward!

Potty Training [Warning, may be TMI]

Madeline awoke before I wanted to. I set her up with breakfast snacks, Dora, and a new diaper and went back to bed [note that my bedroom and TV are 12' away from each other]. After the first Dora episode was over, Madeline walked into the bedroom, said, "Diaper change, Momma!" and handed me her diaper (she also told me what was in it, but I'll leave out the 'gory' details).

Then was bath time. After bath I had her sit on the potty. She finally went in the potty. She heard it looked down then gave her famous surprise face. I almost cried. We're on our way to a diaper-free home!!

PS-- please don't taunt her by telling her that I posted this in say, 11 years, or so...

Update, from the loony bin

I went to a not so sad funeral today. Well, it was still sad. I'm still human; I still don't want to lose anyone close to me, but it was a celebration. Pearl attended the little church that I grew up in from the 40's or 50's until 2 or 3 weeks ago. I will miss her, but everyone there today knew that she's gone on to a better place. Why do I bring this up to you? Because I played the piano at the funeral. Nervous as all get out? Yes, yes, I was. I played my first funeral.

Madeline's 2. She bit me today. Actually, about an hour ago. Still have red teeth marks. I bit her back. But I'm running out of options and patience for this.

Update on moving: I'm working in Harrisonville now instead of Pleasant Hill. Closer to home, farther from school. Therefore, I have decided that we aren't moving until AT LEAST August, maybe later, depending on what we find. I may decide to drive for the semester. I doubt it, but I may. I'm itching to have my own bedroom again.

I was going to post some pictures, but it's taking too dang long. Next time maybe.

We're goin' to the Chapel, and we're, goin' to get...

Mar-ar-ar-aried. Okay, not "we" as in "me" and "someone." "We" as in my cousin Keri and her fiance Daniel decided to get hitched this coming October. Excited for her? Yes I am. Congratulations, Keri and Daniel. I tried to find some embarrasing pictures to post, but no luck. Guess that will come later. Hee hee hee. Congratulations again. I love you both.

On Being the Mommy of a Two Year Old, Part 2

Madeline's birthday was fun. She got some cute little dress up toys and a little Dora doll for her birthday. She also had a little party at datcare, complete with homemade cupcakes. I think she had a good day.

I've been stressed and trying not to write about it here, but I have to. I don't have to, but I am going to anyway. Madeline and I were getting child support checks for just a little while. The amounts were anywhere from $30 to $60 per week. Then they stopped. No word from the state or from the deadbeat. They just stopped. The state sent me a letter telling me that they were looking for him (or his current employer), but no more checks. No deadbeat. For all I know, the guy's dead. Not just living up to his current reputation. He didn't even call on her birthday. Granted, he wasn't there for the birth, so it might be a little hard for him to remember the date. But he didn't call or text or email. Nada. Zip. Zero. Can I call the state and force him to reliquish any rights that he may have at this point? Because, even though I wouldn't have a real conversation with said deadbeat anymore, I'm almost in tears writing this... realizing how much my dad has meant to me, and that he won't ever be a dad. Just a deadbeat. He didn't even call on her birthday.

Happy, Happy Day

This morning, my darling daughter was doing the same thing at 7:15 am that she was two years ago. Screaming her head off. I just smiled, hugged her, and told her "Happy Birthday." Though, I wanted to cry too. How in the world am I the mother of a "Terrible Two"? Is that even possible? Well, it is. And she's a perfect two year old. In every way. I am truly blessed with a wonderful daughter. I couldn't ask for one better. Happy, Happy Birthday, Princess Madeline. Happy Birthday.